Cake Day | AEW #193

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Mercedes Moné

"Put your Moné where your cake is”

by Emiliana

Is there anything more incredible than seeing Mercedes Moné take a celebratory cake to the face? The answer is no, no there isn’t. While it may have been a tad more difficult for me to decide on the MVP this week (spoiler: I didn’t), one thing is for certain: Mercedes Moné continues to give me everything I could possibly want, and she even gives her haters what they want, but they’re too dumb to even realize it.

To top off the first hour of Dynamite this week, Renee Paquette led us through the past weekend for the globe-trotting champion — how Mercedes successfully retained her CMLL women’s championship on Friday, followed it up by defeating Mina Shirakawa at WrestleDream for the interim ROH TV women’s championship, and then topped it off by winning a twelfth belt in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. The only thing that would have made that better is if she won it off Kenny Omega, let’s be real.

But rather than the CEO appearing after her entourage of belt boys, what we found in the ring instead was the muppet silhouette of one Mini Moné (played by Harley Cameron, of course). Once again, Mercedes’ spotlight was taken by a farce, and it was only natural that the real Mercedes would be livid. Irate, she came down to the ring, snapped at her belt boys to leave - as well as Renee - before confronting her puppet arch nemesis. In a world where the CEO has no equals, it only makes sense that her biggest rival would be a version of herself.

As she confronted the puppet, she made insulting remarks to the crowd, calling them stupid marks (which always pops me, I can’t help it) for disrespecting her. She lobbed insults at Mini Moné and Harley, before finally grabbing the puppet and stuffing its face full of cake. Harley came out from underneath the table then, Mercedes cackling at the demise of Harley’s beloved puppet.

Now the question is: did Mercedes believe, by the cosmic laws of wrestling, that because Mini Moné got put through the cake, that she herself would be safe? That the cake gods would be satisfied?

But alas, the answer is that no, they were not.

Kris Statlander, clad in the communal black hoodie, appeared from behind and smashed Mercedes face first into the cake, then picked her up and slammed her down into the cake and through the table. Absolutely incredible work. What’s funnier is that afterwards, we get to see Harley and Kris both doing the CEO dance while licking the frosting off their arms and the face of Mini Moné.

Every week, I am astounded by the amount of harsh criticism that Mercedes receives from lowlifes and vagabonds. Much like how the male wrestlers spend most of their time trying to “pop the boys,” consider that Mercedes and the women’s division are doing the same thing. They are popping the girls… (It’s me… I’m girls.)